HEY!

*gegege, si gila tersayang*

hahaha, lama tak update. Busy, orang jauh dah balik. hahaha. So, just upload some pictures pastu nak tido. Besok nak jalan jauh, hahaha.

seyes weyh, saye ade WACOM. korang yang kate saye tipu tu memang sampah la kan. ingat saye ni hina sangat ke nak menipu?... huuuh...!

Take That - I'd wait for life

There's a place we used to be
There's a face that I used to see
There's a picture with you by my side
There's a moment that I want to find.

I don't know where to start
Or how to begin
But I know I love you still.

If you ever turn away
If you ever change your mind
If the road ahead becomes too hard to climb
If there's something in your heart that tells you to stop
Oh to hold you close tonight
I'd wait for life.

There's a voice shouting inside my head
There's a space on your side of the bed
There's a hope every time there's a sound
There's a silence that's playing too loud

I don't know how you are
Or how you may be
But I know I love you still.

If I close my eyes
I'll dream a little deeper baby
'Cause you are always on my mind
Yeah you are always on my mind
For life.

cheerioous~!! (◕‿◕✿)

Fear of rejection

so, after hours of silent fight between me and VanZiq, we finally at peace again. after a thousands of routine daily call from him, finally, finally, he stops calling me yesterday. erm, we're in fight so... obviously he wont call, i almost, ALMOST miss him thou. hahaha, but then, as always (he always the sensible one) he make the call. hahaha, he make me almost miss his voice. but, it never better when i heard his voice. damn, i'm lame. wth. lmao.


so, we're get back to the root of our fight, he's in very bad mood yesterday... seems like everything he did yesterday didn't work out very well, and well... yes of course, when he need me most i'm not there for him. lol, i forgot to recharge my cellphone. it happens sometime thou. just not the right time yesterday. hahaha. so, my post today basically about fear of rejection, which my dear are facing right now. fear of his project paper will be rejected. i guess its in the same boat.


Almost all of us face rejection at some point of time in our lives. Sometimes, we are rejected for a job offer while other times we face a rejection in relationships. While most of us brush the rejection off and look out for newer opportunities, there are some people who cling to the rejection that came their way. These people simply refuse to accept the fact that they could be rejected in life. One rejection gives a way to the fear of rejection in future, which prevents the person from giving his best and subsequently results in rejection. Thus, the fear of rejection is a vicious circle.


Individuals who experience fear of rejection are found to have a troubled childhood. They never felt loved by their parents or other family members. Also, the constant comparison with their siblings or other kids induces a feeling that if they are not perfect, so they will not be loved. Thus, these kids try to imitate the behavior of the ones who they admire. This is a frantic attempt to fulfill others' expectations so that they are accepted within the group and eventually loved. In the process, they shed their true identity and try to become what people want them to be. This has very negative repercussions on the psyche of the kid. These kids then grow up to become adults who turn out to be 'yes men'. Low self esteem is the most significant personality trait observed in these people.


Although, there are no unique fear of rejection symptoms, these people do exhibit a peculiar behavioral pattern. Such people are not ready to openly communicate and never express their views upon something. More so, if their views happen to be different from the ones they are trying to please. They find it hard to say 'no' to the people they are trying to appease. They even keep their personal feelings hidden. Fear of rejection in relationship often stems from previously failed relationships or rejections. These people are wary of initiating a new relationship or simply asking someone out. They fear that they might be turned down. If they are already in a relationship they might take it too seriously too early, which might drive the other person crazy. These people often associate dangerous words like 'loser', 'incapable', 'humiliation' etc. with rejection. Obviously, this hampers their self esteem in the long run.

People who have a fear of rejection are often manipulated and taken undue advantage of by others, especially those who have a strong impact on the person. While the concerned person bends at their will every now and then, these wicked people have a good laugh at the victim's expense. Unfortunately, no matter how hard a person tries to behave as per the wishes of those who influence him, he is never allowed in their inner circle.

Overcoming fear of rejection is a gradual process that extends over days or even months. The person who faces a fear of rejection needs extensive help from friends and family to come to terms with his true self. He should be taught about how to take things lightly and that rejection is not the end of the world. One rejection often paves way to a new opportunity, which might turn better than you ever imagined. Running away from one's true self cannot bring happiness in your life, instead, the act of molding yourself as per others' wishes can leave you miserable and in a state of self pity. You can be truly happy only when you love the way you are. Interestingly, people will also love you only if you come across as a genuine person, true to yourself.

So he tell me.

lately rajin pakcik VanZiq call, boring dia kate. so, layankan aje. tadi dia keluar lunch dengan officemate, time balik lunch dia terserempak dengan Gary Barlow. punyala dok mengingat sape la mamat Gary ni, Gary the Snail tu saye tau la (siput Spongebob). punyala orang sane dok excited bercerita, orang sini haramjad tak kenal sape la mamat yang dia dok excited sangat tuh. pastu dia diam, wawawa. mesti terasa bercerita sengsorang. pastu dia bagitau yang mamat tu member Take That, Brits pop band.

haa.... ni la Gary Barlow! wawawa...

hahaha, punyala sengal saye ni. ye saye akui. saye sebenarnye suke Take That tu, wawawa, tapi member dia yang saye ingat Brits heartthrob, Robbie William tu je. hahaha. yelakan, dia je yang menonjol sikit berbanding dengan yang lain. so, since kitorang suke kebanyakan bende yang same, dia pun suke Take That. lebih sikit dari saye, memandangkan background Brit dia, dia more to Brits artist compare saye yang universal ni.

Take That muda-muda dulu. (tengok muka Robbie, innocent je)

punyala excited, dia suh si Gary to signature dekat handkerchief pakai marker besar-besar. hahaha. lawak betulla mamat sorang ni. saye pon kadang ade la jumpa artis (artis malaysia la kan, mampus tak layan adela) tapi takde la excited macam tu skali. hahaha. pastu dia cakap plak time dia dah blah meninggalkan si Gary tu ade plak Robbie William dekat situ. punyala siyut kan, saye ni dok la bersungguh-sungguh pesan dekat dia kalau terjumpa RW mintak signature. orang tua tu sakan menggelakkan saye, gila sengal. tapi takpe, tak penting pun.


best buddies, Gary&Robbie


oh, lupa nak bagitau, Gary tu ade bagi kad ape-bende-ntah dekat orang tua tu, dia kate nanti boleh redeem album baru Take That. tak pasti ape album terbaru diorang, tapi yang pasti lagu Flood, memang best cuma vc dia nta pape. after all these years, diorang still mengancam... dan seksi. tiba-tiba rasa yang Gary Barlow ni ensem pulak. hahaha, got to be the accent.


Take That sekarang dengan kemasukan Robbie.


Take That sekarang sebelum kemasukan balik Robbie.


ye, saye tau. macam gay, hahaha, ade satu lagu tajuk dia Shame, vc dia sungguh gay. wtf. tak kesah la, janji dua2 ensem. layankan aje.

cheerioous~!! (◕‿◕✿)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

from London with love.

hahahaha, ingat tak kat sini saye ade mintak kasut iron man dari VaZiq? hahaha, jeng jeng jeng! dah dapat! dah dapat! dah dapat! seronok sangat! tersangatlah berterima kasih dekat VanZiq kesayangan. tak sangka pulak dia belikan betul-betul, aritu time berual dia kata malas nak carik dah, well, saye bukan kisah sangat pun kan... booo, saye tipu. hahaha, saye memang nak sangat kasut ni! hahaha, dia beli dua pasang, lalala, jadi conclusionnya, saye hanya akan pakai kasut ni bila kami bersama! yeay~ kasut sama! (gila Lame... hahaha, wth, pedulik la)

punyala excited dapat kasut baru, hahaha, tak keluar bilik beb! bergayut sakan dengan VanZiq! wawawa, bayangkan la, topup sampai 2kali dalam satu hari! awesome gila la kan... mesti maxis merasa sangat bangga mempunyai pengguna seperti saye! yeay~ tapi apelah sangat berbanding dengan duit dia yang beriban abis belikan saye (yang mengada-ngada ni) macam-macam. hahaha, rase-rase kalau mintak tiket bola dapat tak? mesti mampus tak layan~ lalala~

nasib baik arini dia tak banyak kerja, sambil berbual dengar je tangan dia dok menekan-nekan keyboard macam nak pecah. hahaha, keyboard tu memang kene tekan kuat-kuat dia kate. ape-ape ajelah, percaya sudah... punyala lama bergayut, dari lunch break sampai balik kerja! hahaha, adela berhenti, sembahyang beb. gila lenguh mulut, kering segala saliva yang ada, hahaha. tiba-tiba je banyak idea nak berbual dengan dia.

mood dia baik arini, bagus la kan, Alhamdulillah. biasanya sejuk-sejuk ni meragam sikit orang tua tu, hahaha. seronok bercerita, dia kata kalau orang sane pakai bonus krismas nak beraya sakan, dia pakai bonus krismas menghias rumah. hahaha, untung dapat jumpa lelaki suka mengemas ni, silap hari dapat kahwin untung gila la kan. tak la penat kemas rumah sorang-sorang. LOL, bukan saye ni pemalas ke hape, kira macam fair la kan kemas rumah sama-sama. wawawa.

banyak gak dia bershopping, berikut adelah senarai yang dapat saye ingat:

-barang dapur (ye, Mr. VanZiq juga suka memasak)
-sofa baru [a] IKEA
-lampu study baru [a] IKEA
-almari baju [a] IKEA
-langsir [a] IKEA
-kasut [a] dunhill
-kasut [a] nike (dia & saye)
-baju kemeja (tak ingat berape, tapi lebih sehelai)
-tie [a] dunhill
-t-shirt (adela lam 3-4 helai, mostly dari UNIQLO)
-hoody [a] adidas (star wars wookies hoody, seriously geek!)
-basikal baru (hahaha, nak safe duit minyak katenye+sihat)
-lens baru [85mm,1.8 + 17-40mm,f/4] (okey! sangat cemburu ni!! ciss!!)
-dan beberapa bende lain... er... er... tak ingat dah... hahah

hahaha, dia memang suka bershopping dekat IKEA, senang dia kate. biarkan aje... perasan tak, banyak dia banyak beli baju+kasut, hahaha, mamat ni memang penting kan keterampilan, (tapi tak gak ensem,wawawa,wtf.abaikan saye) lagipun tempat kerja dia memang kene pakai ensem-ensem pun, lol, bukan la ensem, kemas. dia pun merupakan shoe addict, ye, same macam saye, tapi dia lebih kepada kasut gentleman. kasut dunhill dan sewaktunya macam tu berlambak dekat rumah dia, agak-agak taknak pakai dia bagi je kat adik dia. stylo abis adik dia pakai kasut dunhill pi kelas. pffft...

p/s: kan lagi best kalau dia bagi sikit gaji yang berlambak tu kat saye yang memerlukan duit untuk shopping ni... herm... tolong la baca pesanan ni VanZiq!!!

cheerioous~!! (◕‿◕✿)

Saat Keriangan

okey! da abes exam entomology tadi! waaa... rasa agak tenang sikit. tinggal satu paper lagi, lepas raya haji, International Forestry. eherm, open book, so tak kesah sangat. masa untuk bergayut sampai lebam. ahahahaha, literally yer. jangan salah faham.


baru lepas hantar email dekat En VanZiq, nak suruh dia call. safe duit, hahahaha... yelakan, ujung-ujung sem ni, manele ade duit dah la jauh, huhuhu... kalau ade ptptn tu laen la gak. ni, harem. semua harapkan ehsan En VanZiq untuk bayar yuran dan bagai-bagai. ahahaha... dem. dah macam sugar daddy da pakcik ni. hahaha, whatever la wey, janji dapat study. nak ber skype tak ley, orang tua ni tak suka type2 ni, cakap terus senang... tapi susah plak rase bagi saye... tapi... what ever la nyah!

i love you so muachx~!



"you dont need to see someone everyday to tell them that you love them"


oxoxo

cheerioous~!! (◕‿◕✿)

My Knight In Shining Armour

My knight is off to battle.
Oh! But to say that he is mine,
Is really to say that I am his,
That I have fallen
From the clouds which in I did reside,
To stand by him
And pray that I might be his angel.

Fallen though I am,
I carry with me still the light.
And as he enters the dark
To fight his demons
I hope only to shine for him
And assist in finding his way.

He wears his heavy armor,
So many pieces
Forged from the strongest of steels.
He carries his sword and shield
And wields them closely to his chest,
For above all he shall protect,
And he shall swiftly swing his blade,
Ridding himself of nightmares.

But should he falter,
Should his shield but crack
Or his sword slip from perfection,
If my knight, my beautiful knight
Should ever know defeat,
Whether it be great or small,
I would whisk to his side
And kiss his wounds again and again.

And when he hurts
Or when the wounds won’t cease their bleeding
I would but comfort him
And hold him and all his weight,
The weight of armor,
The weight of battles yet to come,
The weight of his troubles in my arms,
I give him no less than two shoulders
If he would only let his body weep.

For as he lays in his bed
Resting after many a fight,
I sit with him and hold his hand
And while he waits he whispers
Such sweet poetic words,
The passion that does emerge
When stripped of his guards
Is more radiant than the sun,
Yet tender as a loving mother
And while he sleeps his essence
Becomes my personal lullaby.

And when his wounds have healed
And his mind and body bear the scars
Of all that has ailed his heart,
I would look upon his face
Beneath the helmet he polishes so,
And I would but assure him
That those scars only make him shine.
That he would not be my knight
Without the marks that made him,
And he is all the more beautiful for it.


just for u my knight whose far away in battlefield of wisdom and wits,
its only sea and time separate us..